You are Grand.

It seems I’ve become one of those seventy-two-hour-freak-shows that parade around the Internet behind some absurd headline. I don’t think many people will go out of their way to see this blog and read this statement so I’ll say this to those of you invested enough to come find the real me. I am not…

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Water Demon: A Wordy FAQ

So, you say you’re a water demon? Well, yeah, sure. In a way…but it is not my sinner’s status that makes me one, it is a disease called Aquagenic Urticaria. This means that all those times my skin broke into hives and my joints bled into themselves were not because of the times I used…

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Soliloquy to a Trash Can

When I turned 14 my parents suddenly stopped supplying me with everything I wanted. I thus was forced to obtain employment at a water park. Not only did I decide to work in a water park, the most trite of first job options, but I decided to work as a park service employee. This meant…

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